Death, life, and hope

Jolene hung up and wept.  When her sister announced she was pregnant, all the feelings she thought she'd dealt with crushed her like an ocean wave.  It'd been three years since "the decision."  Derek bolted as soon as he'd heard.  She didn't dare talk it over with her mom.  In fact, she'd discussed it with no one save the clinic's counselor who said that it was no different than having a wart removed.

That was a lie.  Jolene had begun to feel the baby move before "the procedure."  Where once she felt the flutter of tiny feet, a void as dark as night had embedded itself.  And now for the next nine months, Jolene would paste on a smile and feign delight over each step of her sister's pregnancy.  As the baby grew, so would Jolene's grief. 

Carolyn knew that same, debilitating pain.  Her despair grew to such a size that it seemed only suicide could slay the beast.  Then she heard a friend talking about finding forgiveness from God in Jesus Christ.  She shared that what Jesus had done on the cross covered the sin of all mankind and covered her sin, too.  Carolyn's heart leapt for a split-second and just as quickly sank back into her solitary abyss.  Nothing could atone for what she'd done.  Still she lingered on that "gospel" message.

She flipped open an old Bible she kept on the shelf (for good luck) to one of the books (why do they call chapter-sized sections "books?") her friend mentioned.  Romans.  And she read.  "The gospel...the power of God  for salvation to everyone who believes."  Everyone?  Really.  We'll see.  "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."  No kidding, Carolyn grunted.  Then her eye caught.

For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life.  (Romans 5:6-10)

She couldn't undo what she'd done.  Could it be she didn't have to?  Could it be that despite her sin, God could still love her?  Could it be that the love of God in Jesus Christ could heal and restore?  "Nothing will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."  Oh my.  In hope beyond hope, Carolyn cried out to God and trusted that what Christ had done was sufficient for her, too.  She trusted his mercy and grace and collapsed into his arms.

From that day, her life had changed.  Oh, her grief remained; the past could not be undone.  But now she had a hope, a real and living hope.  God's word gave her hope for her life even now, and it also gave her hope for the afterlife.  As David said, though her child could not be brought back, Carolyn now knew that she would one day see her child whole in the presence of her Savior.

Still a cloud remained.  Despite the restoration of her relationship with God, Carolyn could not bring herself to share her history with anyone in church.  What would they say?  When the pastor would preach on the sanctity of human life, she grieved in silence, mask firmly in place, unaware that within thirty feet of where she sat, three other women wept inside as well.

The abortion coin has two very dark sides.  On one side, abortion destroys a life physically.  Churches and Christians must not be silent about what abortion is.  It is the destruction of a living human being.  Not because the Pope says so.  Not because my pastor says so.  Not because I say so.  It is killing innocent life because God in his word says so. 

Jolene and Carolyn illustrate the other side of the coin.  Millions of women live in torment over what they have done believing they have no hope.  Even those who have experienced the true forgiveness, the only true healing, that comes through Jesus Christ often keep their secret hidden within the church fearing the potential condemnation from brothers and sisters in Christ. 

Within the emotional trauma of those who have received God's forgiveness in Christ is a promise of grace.  Paul recognized himself as the chief of sinners (1 Timothy 1:15), but he was unashamed to speak of what he had done before meeting Christ (Acts 22:4, 26:11) because the vast chasm between his before and after testified to the work of his God and Savior, Jesus Christ, in his life.  The very thing that causes you grief, that very area where God has provided you forgiveness and comfort, might be the very thing that will serve to comfort one who has trod that same pathway.

Sanctity of Human Life Sunday is this week.  Those who know the redemption of God in Christ must continue speaking the truth about the horrors of abortion.  At the same time, we must begin to unashamedly offer the hope of redemption in Jesus Christ for those who have walked that midnight of the soul and to unreservedly offer compassion for those redeemed who still grieve the death of their child.